Fantasy Time

Having read the book "Fantasyland" by Sam Walker several months ago, i've been jonesing for this upcoming baseball season hard. however, seeing as how recent fantasy endeavors have left me unsatisfied (read: i blew, i sucked, i did whatever i could with this mouth of mine in a derogatory manner), i decided to approach everything differently...or at least as close as i could in this time of sports media saturation (like starting a new sports blog!), back when i was actually good at it.


and so now, the season is upon us. the opening day starters are listed, lineups are all but set, and my own draft has come and gone. in the days leading up to 4/1/07 i plan on listing my own fantasy pre-rankings in addition to whatever sport-related tidbit i'd like to share. so here is my initial predictions for this season:


AL MVP: Alex Rodriguez - let's be serious here. the man is in a walk year, he dropped about 12 pounds in the off season, he's coming off a relatively shotty season, and he's now got a chip on his shoulder the size of brooklyn. plus, it's just regular season MVP, it doesn't carry over into the playoffs or anything. a sleeper candidate could be a healthy travis hafner.

NL MVP: Albert Pujols - this man has gotten robbed more than a blind man flashing dollar bills in detroit. he should have about four trophies, but instead has one due to ignorant voting. what does he have to do to get another, win the triple crown? sneaking up to seize it could be jose reyes if he keeps improving in leaps and bounds.

AL Cy Young: Johan Santana - as much as i'd like to hope it would be Jeremy Bonderman, we should just go with a winning formula and say it's santana. a dark horse for this one could also be jonathan papelbon back in the closer role or roy halladay with healthy run support and healthy...health.

NL Cy Young: Carlos Zambrano - he's got the stuff, he's got the support, and he's got the motivation of a huge (HUUUUUUGE) potential cotract. the only thing that can derail him is if he actually rips his arm off on the mound. the only person who could upset him is ben sheets...assuming his body doesn't fall apart.

AL Not-So-Sleeper: Mark Teixeira - honestly, if everything's on track, the dude's gonna mash the cover off the ball benny rodriguez-style.

NL Not-So-Sleeper: Morgan Ensberg - dude had a bum shoulder. cost him some hardware (look at his April numbers! disgusting! he had about 15-17 dongs before his shoulder cut out). however, his batting eye improved (101 walks over 96 K's).

AL Sleeper: Mark Teahen - as a rookie he hit 18 home runs and was 10 for 10 on stolen bases....FOR THE ROYALS. plus, he has dual eligibility as both a 3B and an OF.

NL Sleeper: Brad Hawpe - those cooky rockies seem to gestate these hitters and birth them forth recently, eh? hopefully this guy will be next in line....'cause i drafted him.


now, 3B rankings (contract year in italics):
1. Alex Rodriguez
2. Miguel Cabrera
3. David Wright
4. Aramis Ramirez
5. Troy Glaus (SS)
6. Garrett Atkins - he's gonna have to do it again before i believe in him.
7. Morgan Ensberg
8. Scott Rolen
9. Ryan Zimmerman - who's batting behind him? dmitri young? oy.
10. Eric Chavez
11. Bill Hall (SS) - why not just put him at 3B for real and let tony gwynn, jr. lead off?
12. Chipper Jones
13. Joe Crede
14. Adrian Beltre
15. Brandon Inge
16. Mark Teahen (OF)
17. Chad Tracy
18. Melvin Mora
19. Mike Lowell - am i crazy or is he kinda good again?
20. Hank Blalock - what the capital F happened to THIS guy?
21. Wilson Betemit (2B, SS)



and now for some non-baseball articles:

• NHL playoffs start in two weeks. joe thornton is making a serious bid for NHL MVP in addition to overtaking hockey jesus (sidney crosby) for the Art Ross. dominik hasek still has a groin. people in carolina don't realize they have a team...still. things are heating up!
• if they lions take brady quinn over joe thomas i just may, in fact, collect a small group of befuddled fans to rescue bill clay ford, jr. from matt millen's basement to alert him of the fact that his team IS BEING RUN INTO THE GROUND.
• tubby smith going to minnesota - good for them...not for him.
• best final four in years, eh? and how cool would an old-school meeting of UCLA and Georgetown be in the finals? maybe we can forgive patrick ewing for being ugly. maybe.
• um. nascar?
• why are the bears dismantling ever-so-slowly? didn't they just go to the Super Bowl?

don't you want to party with the NBA MVP candidates? i sure do.